Our real relationship with jiu-jitsu
Having taught jiu-jitsu for over 15 solid years, I often act as a mentor for students’ relationships off the mats. Come to think of it, my students over the years have experienced the ups and downs of my relationships off the mats. It was jiu-jitsu that gave us all something to relate too during these times. Some the best lessons I ever taught related to the give and take concept(s) in the art of jiu-jitsu. “Listen, if the person wants to submit me from this position, she has to commit with the hand in the collar and it’s that moment & timing, I have have a chance to win the position to escape. The magic of jiu-jitsu is in the timing and application of giving and taking we come to learn.
All my young students, the boys often and some times girls, ask what they can do with their current boyfriends and girlfriends if they are having a problem in the relationship. I like to keep things positive and tell them that jiu-jitsu will always be here and you can work through the challenges. I like to joke and tell the guys, “Look man this is one way that people stop training bro…They fall in love and I don’t see them again!” The boys say, “no way,”…and I smile just little more because it is true. One of the real relationships with jiu-jitsu that was have is bring able to understand challenges in our live, dynamics we share and learn through the practice of Martial Arts.
Having a problem in your relationship at home? What “stage” (Watch the film above) are you in and what is your position? Now that you understand your position: how are you going to move from there? Are you going to act or react? Let me know what your are feeling. Express it to me. Now go home and express yourself so you can work through these challenges. Jiu-Jitsu will be here tomorrow, but it is with you now and always to use.
Prof. Tony Pacenski
2nd Degree Black Belt
BJJ Revolution Team
Elite Training Center
1628 South Pacific Coast Highway,
Redondo Beach, CA 90277
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